Friday, August 16, 2013

Jodoh tanpa pertemuan :)

Terlalu cepat masa berlalu that I did not realized dah 7 tahun aku bergelar "balu". And suddenly he asked, "will you wait for me? please give me time to improve things". And I replied, "for how long?". "2 years", he answered.

I never thought someone younger would have feelings for me, and I think it has been quite sometime that he kept that to himself. I had mixed feelings, of course. I did not know how to react.

And then so many things hit my head. What would his mother say? What would his father think? Will his siblings accept me? Am I not too old for him? Will I be a good wife? Can I respect him? Will he love me? Can he accept me the person I am? Will he be able to change me for the better? And why me? I am 6 years older. Did he feel sorry because no one else wants me? What are the things he saw in me, that made him fall for me? Will Abah agree? Will there be any other objection? The last time I met him was 6 years ago... and tetiba dia muncul kembali.

Aku terlupa. Jodoh itu rahsia Allah. Janjilah setahun, 2 tahun, waima 3 tahun sekalipun, jika itu adalah ketentuan Allah, it will happen. Namun jika ia tidak tertulis untuk kita, nothing will happen.

Untuk 2 tahun yg akan datang (or precisely 1 tahun 10 bulan 21 hari), berusahalah agar apa yg diimpikan akan tercapai. Selagi tiada ikatan, there's nothing between us. If I die, you can't help to mandikan. Solat jenazah, insyaAllah boleh. If I fall sick, you can't help to soothe me down. Just a visit, insyaAllah boleh. Atas nama saudara sesama Islam.

I am glad that you are living far away. Which means we don't really see each other. And I don't want you to know so much about myself (tapi kalau mak yang tanya, takpe). If anything happen, no one has to suffer to forget. In my life, I have encountered several broken promises, and I believe I hurt enough. Please don't take this as something negative.

Apa yg ada di dalam hati, sampaikanlah kepadaNya. Mudah-mudahan Allah makbulkan.

P/S: Lenkali, simpan buku nota. Bila mak tanya, and you don't have the answer, write down the question. Bebila free, whatsapp me the question. I will provide the answer :)

P/S/S: Thanks much for the dooodolls! Sajer nak suh orang kembali rasa muda remaja eh?

P/S/S/S: For you and me, jaga diri, hiasi peribadi :)

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MAN... gets and forgets...
ALLAH... gives and forgives...